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Old July 16, 2012   #1
QAGuy
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Default LA Times op-ed on tomatoes

Here's an interesting article from today's LA Times.

Parts of it may remind you of yourself.


The author writes middle grade, teen, and young adult novels about friends and enemies and school and families and life in general.

Gardening -- dirt deeds and dire warnings:
by Amy Goldman Koss

July 15, 2012

Last winter, in preparation for the planting of tomatoes, I spent months carting banana peels and coffee filters out to the compost bin, taking solace that when my novels resisted writing, at least I was making brilliant dirt.

In early spring, I spooned the homemade compost into planters and then went off in search of a few skinny, needy, inexpensive vegetable plants to love and to cherish until death parts us and I consign their depleted corpses to the compost. I do this in full knowledge that one day the plant world will get its turn to feast on my remains.

Until then, each April I tuck the wee plants in like babies in a crib. I don't name them, but I watch them grow, each differently, as is the nature of things. I take pride in this one's height, in the strength of that one's young stalks, in the texture of their leaves and their bright yellow blossoms. We are a team: I supply nutrients for them, and they in turn supply nutrients to me.

In my benevolent, omnipotent way, I tend to their needs, propping up a branch, scattering fertilizer, banishing weeds.

I neither threaten nor bully. But I suspect they understand the precariousness of their fates. Their planters are surrounded by dry yellow grass I've abandoned to the drought, and cactus and succulents have replaced their needier brethren around the yard. Beyond, the surrounding hillsides have become heaps of kindling, just itching to burst into flames.

The tomatoes get breakfast in bed, straight from the hose. In exchange, I occasionally pluck their perfect babies from their arms and pop them into my mouth, their bodies sweet, juicy and still warm from the sun.

I hate to think the plants offer their fruits like desperate villagers making a sacrifice to a fickle god, or that they aren't really offering them at all but are simply unable to defend them.

But in the end, it is hard to know what they think of me. Try as I might to think like a plant and see things from their point of view, how can I know if I've gotten it right? As I wander the yard of a morning, coffee in hand, nodding to my fig tree, saluting the eggplants, do they see Kindly Old Amy, bringer of water? Do they smirk and make snide comments behind my back? Am I like the boss who believes he's beloved because everyone laughs at his jokes and feigns interest in his grandson's Little League prowess? Or do they tremble and quake, asking one another if this is the day their young will be taken?

It occurs to me as I write these thoughts that there are dangers inherent in trying to understand things from the tomato's viewpoint. For one, I am a vegetarian, so too much empathy with my garden could lead to starvation. I also worry that my fiction writing has expanded past the reasonable boundaries of keyboard and screen.

Fortunately, my plants don't seem to hold a grudge. Or perhaps they think life at any cost is worth the imperfect trade. Not only do they keep supplying me with their bounty; they also seem to want to reenlist. Every week, eager volunteer tomato plants spring up from last year's crop as if to say, "I'm back! Let's do it again!"

I have decided to take this as absolution. And a good thing too, because it's lunchtime and I'm in a tomato sandwich kind of mood.
Amy Goldman Koss' latest novel for teens is "The Not-So-Great Depression."
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Old July 16, 2012   #2
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AHAHAH pretty funny.
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Old July 17, 2012   #3
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Consider the quaking tomato fruit of a tomatovillian: plucked from the plant before its prime, watched constantly until it reaches the peak of ripeness, then slashed with a knife, its precious seeds scooped out and left to rot in a glass, then rinsed, dried, and sent to the four corners of the world, where next season the seeds will find themselves under the care of a different, but perhaps no less fanatical tomato gardener. As the gardener crouches in the shade of that defruited plant this season and whispers the tale of where its seeds will land, the plant resolves to pump out more tomatoes. Yes, she sighs, choose me again! and send my progeny far and wide!
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Old July 17, 2012   #4
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Such a delight to read. Thanks for posting it!
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Old July 17, 2012   #5
tjg911
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Amy Goldman Koss

is this the dreaded amy goldman? i did not read the article without knowing because she is persona non grata in my book.

tom
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Old July 17, 2012   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tjg911 View Post
Amy Goldman Koss

is this the dreaded amy goldman? i did not read the article without knowing because she is persona non grata in my book.

tom
No. Amy Goldman Koss actually writes books.
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Old July 17, 2012   #7
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Tom, I had to do a search just to satisfy my own skeptical mind. As feldon said: "she actually writes books"

Seems that Amy Goldman Koss writes fiction for and about young adults (mostly teen girls) with an emphasis on morals, drama, etc.

She does not seem to be a person of infamy or dubious character. In fact, just the opposite.

...non grata...he he.
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Old July 17, 2012   #8
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Wow you guys and SSE...intense
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Old July 17, 2012   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by QAGuy View Post
I hate to think the plants offer their fruits like desperate villagers making a sacrifice to a fickle god, or that they aren't really offering them at all but are simply unable to defend them.

Or do they tremble and quake, asking one another if this is the day their young will be taken?
BAHAHA! This is hilarious stuff! Had me laughing. Will have to check her books out! Yes, I read teenage books some times - got a problem with that? I love cartoon movies too - but I digress....

I've been wondering about my tomato plants and I lately....imagining the conversations. I know. I should make an appointment with a shrink cuz it just don't seem right.

Last edited by babice; July 17, 2012 at 02:10 PM.
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Old July 17, 2012   #10
Sun City Linda
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I developed a fairly negative view of Amy Goldman after reading her Tomato Book, which, is not worth the money IMO. After reading the thread on Seed Savers I realized it was a correct call.
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Old July 17, 2012   #11
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Well a ghost writer's gotta do what a ghost writer's gotta do.
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Old July 17, 2012   #12
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This is a show going around here in USA, this is the show from Seed Savers, if you can stomach watching A. Goldman enjoy
http://www.growingagreenerworld.com/?s=amy+goldman

I just watch this again O MY, I am sick!!!!!

Last edited by FILMNET; July 17, 2012 at 03:22 PM.
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Old July 17, 2012   #13
QAGuy
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Just for the record folks.

Amy Goldman Koss and Amy Goldman are two different people!
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