Memo to my furry critter friends

[TomNJ]

Dear Groundhogs, Deer, Squirrels, Rabbits, and Raccoons,

I know we have not always gotten along on the friendliest of terms, but I would now like to propose a truce. You see, my 42 tomato plants have already yielded over 1,800 tomatoes weighing over 700 pounds. My canning shelves are filled, even double stacked, with hundreds of jars of tomato salsa, tomato sauce, tomato soup, and tomato juice, all for just my wife and me. But is the season over ..... noooo! Those dang green monsters just keep pumping out more and more of those confounded red juice balls! I'm done, through I tell you, I can't take it anymore...UNCLE ALREADY!!! If I see one more ripe tomato I'll scream!

So, my furry friends, please be advised that the garden gate is open, the shotgun unloaded, and the welcome sign is up. Please feel free to help yourself - bring your families and take 'em red, take 'em green, take 'em any dang way you want - JUST TAKE 'EM! This is a limited time offer, so please hurry, and bring you appetites!

Your friend,

Tom